Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Behold: The Awesomeness of Joba

With all the hubbub surrounding Joba's first start tonite (not to mention all the second-guessing), Larry Dubrow at CBSSports.com had this to say:

Just how anticipated is Joba's starting-rotation bow? The broadcast networks waved the white flag, serving up a mix of House reruns ("House makes an improbable diagnosis and acts all ornery and whatnot") and election coverage. The NHL bumped the potential Game 6 of the Stanley Cup playoffs back to Wednesday so as not to intrude upon the low-brimmed righty's spotlight dance. The NBA delayed the start of the 2008 Finals by two days, just in case the country needs Wednesday to digest the beacon of magnificent awesomeness that is Joba.

So outside of the expected -- a no-hitter, a quasi-religious experience, the dawning of a new age in contemporary sports and, indeed, Western civilization -- what can we expect from Joba's first A-team night on the big stage? It'll probably go something like ...
I recommend a read of the entire article if you enjoy some tongue-in-cheek humor and can laugh at Yanks fans (or yourself, as the case may be).

8:28 p.m.: Joba throws his 71st and final pitch of the evening. It is a wonderful pitch, an otherworldly pitch, a cruel pitch, a slider. This slider is to all sliders that preceded it what Alec Baldwin is to Java Man, what brie is to Kraft American singles. It goes for a called third strike and Lyle Overbay retreats dugout-ward, demoralized. On his way off the field, Joba tips his cap ever-respectfully to the fans, who respond by lapsing into euphoria-induced seizures.
Awesome! Well played, sir.

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